Hard to follow...

So I've decided that I blew everything with my first post...I tried to be entertaining and I think I succeeded, but now I don't know if I can give a repeat performance...this blogging stuff is so much pressure!


At the end of my last post I said I would follow up with my plumbing woes...so here it goes. It's not too exciting, but it was very traumatizing! I couldn't clean...couldn't do dishes...couldn't cook!!! Wait! Who am I kidding??? It wasn't traumatizing! It was GREAT!!!!

By now you're probably on the edge of your seats thinking "Come on Liz! Get on with it! What was the big plumbing issue?" Because I like all of you so much I must pause to warn you...this isn't pretty...it might be TMI...you might have nightmares! So, if you think you can't handle it, grab your Drano and RUN! OK...are all the little kiddies gone? All the squeamish scurrying away? Great! To start, I'd like to talk about garbage disposals...why are they named garbage disposals??? Because according to Craig, you're not supposed to put "food garbage" down the garbage disposal. You're supposed to put that stuff in the trash can. Well why the heck didn't I think of that?!?!? I'll tell you why I didn't think of that! Because it's called a GARBAGE DISPOSAL!!! And one would think that it's job is to dispose of garbage right? Apparently not! All I did was put a little "past it's prime" ham down the garbage disposal and the next thing I know, it's coming right back out the other sink drain!

So, being the responsible pseudo homeowner that I am I immediately looked for the cheapest handy man I could find! Stacy and Jeff had used a very nice and reasonably priced man named Assad. Assad came out the next day to take a look at the drain situation. He got out his fancy pipe snake thing (no laughing Melissa and Jennifer!!!) and tried to "catch" that clog, but...and now I really mean NO LAUGHING...he figured out that his snake wasn't big enough or long enough to unclog my pipes...okay okay...go ahead...all you people with the dirty minds get it out of your system, because you're going to laugh even harder in a minute! Assad didn't have the right equipment with him that day, so we set an appointment for him to come back again.

Assad came back the next week, and I guess the snake he was using this time was so big that it required another person's help...just kidding...NOBODY has a snake that big! Long story short, they were all over the place, on the back porch, the back yard (it's where the septic tank pipey hole thingy is), and on the roof to fix this stupid clog! But the important part is they fixed it! Now I'm just so happy and excited, because I can clean and cook and do dishes again...










Oh...then to top it off...after Assad and his "lil buddy" left, I went out into the back yard to make sure the gates and stuff were closed before I let my pup out and guess what I found in the grass where they had been working!?!?!?! Now this really is nasty...it was some toilet paper!!! One guess where that came from!!! I know I know...I'm gagging just thinking about it...So of course I squeaked my disgust and immediately ran into the house to put on my rubber gloves and grabbed a plastic Publix bag and ran out to pick it up with the bag...than quickly ran around the house (because it's just too nasty to run through the house) to toss it in the garbage can in the garage!!! And of course the rubber gloves had to be thrown away and my hands had to be washed in the hottest water I could tolerate!!! Lord do I wish we were on city sewer!!!

So, that's it...that's my story...I told you it wasn't anything major...now that I've left you with pleasant thoughts and happy dreams I am going to end this post...next time... My Puppy has ADD???